Disposition 7

Efficacy

Children cannot be fooled by empty praise and condescending encouragement...ego identity gains real strength only from wholehearted and consistent recognition of real accomplishment, that is, achievement that has meaning in the culture.

-Erik Erikson

Describe a time when you helped someone believe in their ability to succeed at something.

Today, I had a violin lesson with my four year old student. She has been playing the violin for two and a half months or so, and she has made so much progress! Admittedly, the first month or so, I myself was discouraged because I thought we'd be moving at a much faster pace. When I started playing cello and bass in my String Methods course, I felt what it was like to do something completely foreign to me. I didn't understand why someone (young or old) wouldn't be able to put their first finger down in the right spot on the fingerboard and move the bow at the correct speed. I really didn't understand that that wasn't a fair expectation. I began to think about how much her four year old brain was processing, and how much of that was new for her. I was overwhelmed with excitement and pride.

When I understood what she was going through, I began to give her more genuine praise. I, of course, always told her she was doing a good job, even if I could not recognize the tune she was playing. Yes, she was doing a good job, but I wouldn't have been able to tell you why. Understanding what's difficult and what is happening for the person you're instructing almost forces you to be somewhat emotionally invested.

Well, today, she was having trouble standing without wiggling around, and couldn't play more than two notes in a row without putting her instrument down because she was tired. When she needed to take a break, I would tell her all the things she was doing well, and then give her one thing to think about for when we played next. It seems like common sense, but knowing that how hard she was working helped me to tell her how happy I was with her progress. She could tell the difference between my praise in recent weeks (more genuine) and earlier in the semester (less genuine) and my genuine praise effected her focus, which effected her progress.